Tomorrow I finally start my radiotherapy. I am a little apprehensive. Like much of medical science these days it seems extreme (and I do sometimes wonder if it is a one size fits all approach which is not always the best) but I have to put my trust int he medical professionals and my faith in God that this is the path I am meant to walk int he long run.
They give you all the worst-case scenarios when you do your consent because, sadly, they have to as we live in such a litigious society these days. They assure you that some of the effects are very very rare (well I was told it was very rare for anyone called back for a mammogram to have anything wrong, then I was told it was very rare for the calcification to become DCIS and then very very rare for the DCIS to become invasive ... you get my point ... I checked all of those rare boxes)
Anyway - come tomorrow they are going to attack my poor booby, healthy tissue and all, with high-dose radiation which my body then has to fight to recover from and at the very least I am likely to be sore, red, blister, peel and generally be fed up again. I only have to have 5 sessions but they are higher dose. I am guessing I can add dry and peelings kin to my still blue and tender poor nipple. Apparently, it can take well over a year for the discolouration to fade away and sometimes it never does. But, if this stops me getting a re-occurence, or at least lessens the chances, that is good. I still haven't decided what I am going to do about the hormone therapy drugs when I am reviewed in a few weeks time.
Anyway - today I feel well - no damage yet - and I have been scrapping
Firstly two digital pages to share
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April 23 Artsy layered template #4
and I have my other class pages for ATDML to share too
Today I am thankful for
There are gorgeous new Berry Big Deal bundles available today in store. The colours were wonderful and here are three I worked with last week
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Here comes the sun by Tiramisu designs
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Young at heart bundle by Chunlin Designs
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Life’s Little Joys Bundle by Fayette Designs
It's been a busy week of appointments from DEXA scans to dentistry and then my radiotherapy planning appointment.
And what was I most nervous about - the dentist of course. I have had big pieces chopped out of my boobs and not paniced and a dentist trip still freaks me out. She had found some decay on my recent x ray and so it needed filling and even she said 'goodness that was a lot deeper than I thought!' Thankfully it didn't hurt and hasn't hurt since. Better filled than not I guess.
Yesterday I had my CT planning appointment. Another new department of the hospital to explore. The radiotherapy girls were, like all of the staff, just lovely. They were very calming and patient, went through lots of info first and even discussed anastrazole with me. They didn't seem to think it was a problem if I came off it. And I was reassured that it was on my records that I was considering stopping it - so the oncologist WAS listening after all.
You then do the radiotherapy planning which involves lying in a fixed position under the scanner where every single bit is measured and marked up and logged and computerised and then you are scanned and then you have three little dots tattooed on you for ever. Another reminder of the cancer journey. They made it as easy as possible but 15 minutes lying down with your arms above and behind your head holding onto a bar was quite challenging. I am glad I did all the breast and arm exercises - this is why they tell you you have to do them.
Our reward was very naughty - a Macdonalds breakfast! Something we almost never do and a wicked but enjoyable treat however - whilst I totally get the need for cardboard cutlery as it is helping save the planet. What I DON'T get is how can they possibly produce forks that won't hold whilst you try to cut soft pancakes
Other than hospitals we have had a few trips out and generally a nice few days. My radiotherapy starts later this month and once that is done I can start to put the last 5 months behind me. It's been quite the roller coaster.
This is a new digital page made for a challenge listing the many things I am thankful for through that whole journey
I have never painted a portrait before - this was for a challenge and kind of worked. It was very quick to do
and this was another digital page - a new release from Palvinka at Pickleberrypop
and this was for another challenge
Today I am thankful for
It is offical as of yesterday
I am cancer free.
It's been a busy week. I met witht he oncologist on Monday who wasn't as helpful or professional as we might have hoped. She seemed very flakey and didn't instil us with confidence. We asked lots of questions and the answers were not very clear. One question was what the advantages of Anastrazole were in terms of prevention of reoccurence. She said that I was at about a 10% increase in risk of reoccurrence but that Radiotherapy halved that - so 5% and anastrozole halved that again so 2.5%. To be honest for a drop of only 2.5% we are not convinced the anastrozole is worth the many many side effects.
We will wait and see. I plan to try 3 months and then re-evaluate. we asked what happened when you came off it after 5 years. Did your body suddenly produce lots of oestrogens again and your risk went up a lot. She didn't really know as she didn't see patients at the end of the journey but she felt they felt it was OK! That wasn't very knowledgeable. It seemed we found out more from Dr Google. However, the main purpose of the visit was to start the radiotherapy process which we did. The side effects of that sound grim but it is necessary and I am now waiting for the appointment for the CT scan to set up the target areas and then about 10 days after that I will start radiotherapy. I am pleased that it is only a course of 5 treatments given daily over a week. They used to do three weeks but they found the difference in results from 1 week to 3 weeks was negligible so since 2019 it is just a week which we are pleased about. Again it's not nice to do that to yoru body but needs must.
I was not able to celebrate being cancer free on 8th February when I had my breast results because I was still undergoing lots of tests because they believed I was at risk of uterine cancer due to several bleeds. Yesterday I went in as a day patient to have a hysteroscopy and possible polypectomy and the results of all of that were no sign of cancer. They were so sure they didn't do biopsies. They don't know why it is happening to me but at the moment I am clear. If I have any further bleeds, especially after 6 months since yesterday I have to go back because they will look again.
It has been a real roller coaster of a rise since 22nd October last year and I don't think either of us has quite processed it yet. There are several things of importance though. Our national health service, despite what the press say, is alive and well and when it needs to pull out all the stops it does. The staff are wonderful. I was looked after so well yesterday by everyone from the reception staff to the nurses, doctors and anaesthetists - they were all wonderful. It did highlight again, though, the difference between Bournemouth and Poole. Bournemouth is an altogether nicer experience.
I hve received so many messages of support throughout the last 5 months from so many people - friends on facebook, texts, phonecalls, and messages from readers here. And it has meant so much. I wanted to be open and honest about it all and promote the need to get yourself checked but I have been so supported by everyone.
The other important thing is that I couldn't have gotten through it without Jakki and Nigel. Jakki is always there with wise words, comfort and support. She will cry with me, laugh with me and encourage me. Nigel is just an utter saint. He has been to every appointment, researched everything, and supported me physically, mentally and practically and he really has lived those words - in sickness and in health. I am truly blessed.
So on to other news.
New releases at Pickleberrypop today and I worked with this gorgeous new collection from Tiramisu
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Art Box number 1 by TirAmisu Designs
and also this from Chunlin
March 2023 Artsy Layered template #3 by Chunlin Designs
Our adventure bundle by Chunlin Designs
Today I am thankful for
being cancer free and grateful to everyone who contributed to my physical and mental wellbeing throughout this whole process
The great digi scrap off runs all month and there are three amazing challenges every week. If you complete all three tasks you win a mini kit each week and the five weeks add up to one utterly amazing awesomely fabulous mega kit. Isn't it gorgeous
I was thrilled to be hosting the showstopper challenge this week and it was to scrap a page about a news event and your reaction to it. I went with the nurses strike which affected one of my appointments but how I still whole-heartedly support them.
I also worked with other things this week.
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Our affection Collaboration Bundle by CarolW designs, Dutch Dream Designs, and Kakleidesigns
Save 52% for a limited time and 25% for every single
And here are three pages I made with just some of that mega collection you can get for free this month by completing the challenges
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Life is a Dream - GDSO Mega Kit
(if you complete all three challenges each week you will get a part of it - if you complete all challenges in time you will have the complete kit at the end of the month)
Today it is Berry Big Deal day at Pickleberrypop and the colours are glorious this month
This shares 4 collections I worked with
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Still my Favourite BBD Bundle by Fayette Designs
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Bookish BBD Bundle by TirAmisu Designs
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Spring Love BBD Bundle by e t designs
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Crazy Friends BBD Bundle by Chunlin Designs
Just a very quick post to share a valentine page made with a new release at Pickleberrypop.
Of course Nigel is my main valentine but then there are also my other 2 boys
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Valentine collection and FWP by Jen Yurko
This is what I made using a scrap squad lift
And this paper page was also another scrap squad lift
And I haven't a thankfulness yet as the day is just begun but I am thankful for all three of my boys - both of the fur ones and the 'skin' one.
These just amused me
Thank you so much to everyone for your lovely kind e mails and messages and comments - it has meant a great deal.
I think it is fair to say we are still in shock and I keep checking with Nigel that it is true! I started the medication yesterday and just hope side effects are not too bad.
And the great news is I have felt more like scrapping and been more able to scrap physically too. So I have new pages to share! Whoo hoo.
These two were made for various challenges on facebook and the first was also a sketch on scrap a sketch
This one was from Sunday's drive and it really does remind us of diagon alley
and this was watching the surfers last month
and this is a digital page
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Together Collection by palvinka Designs
Today - and I expect every day for the rest of my life - I am thankful for being breast cancer free
I am also thankful for
a beautiful walk by the beach in the sunshine
watching the birds in the garden
friends far and near
Well it has been a mixed bag here.
Friday late afternoon we got the call to say that due to the nurses strike my results appointment on 7th had been cancelled and I was being referred back to Poole at Mr Tatterton had no appointments until March. We were devastated and another lady rang back to say she would ring me Monday and try and get me in with Miss Mella at Poole quite soon.
Of course it was late Friday so it wasn't possible to do anything about it at that point so I had quite a depressed day on Saturday. I haven't really let any of this get me down - I have been quite surprised at my resilience to be honest. I am not generally known for my glass being half full!! But Saturday was a real down day and I just couldn't shake it.
Nigel took me out for dinner at Wagamama and yesterday we took a drive along the coast calling in at Milford on sea, KeyHaven and Lymington and it did really cheer me up. We made a plan to call the hospital on Monday afternoon if we hadn't heard anything.
Keyhaven
A street that looks kid of like Diagon Alley in Lymington
Today I woke feeling worried but suddenly in my feed this popped up as we were on our way out
It was just what I needed to see and that message - couple with the sea which always helps - make me feel so much less worried and happy that it was not anything I needed to worry about because He had it in hand.
About half an hour later, whilst on the beach - the phone rang and it was the hospital to say I have an appointment on Wednesday this week - so a delay of less than 24 hours. God is indeed good.
Oh and the beach was beautiful
And we drove past the hospital on the way home to give a thumbs up to the nurses out on the picket line because even though my initial appointment was cancelled I support them whole-heartedly.
I have new scrapping to share.
This is a free with purchase collection at Pickleberrypop
and this I have just made with the free February mystery box collection
and finally a painting I did last week - bit of a different style for me to be honest
Today I am thankful for
Extra new releases this week - so a very quick post about those
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Sow with love page kit by Kakleidesigns
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You and Me page kit by Bellisae designs
It's been lovely weather here and we have enjoyed some nice beach walks sprinkled in alongside yet more hospital trips. We take the good with the rough.
The good news is I seem to be healing well apart from the neuropathic pain so we will take that bit of good news.
I did a very quick and simple painting yesterday inspired by a challenge in a facebook group. It was fun to make
and it is new release day today over at Pickleberrypop and I felt more up to playing this week
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January Artsy layered template by Chunlin designs
Slow Living by Chunlin Designs
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Artsy layered template #2 by Chunlin designs
You make me laugh Bundle by Chunlin Designs
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With Love all in One by Natalie Designs
Today I am thankful for
