Dolly's Dreamings

Reason for missing - a bit of a shock

I missed posting yesterday but I wasn't in a very blogging sort of mood to be honest. I had a bit of a worry.

I have been battling with rib pain for weeks and weeks. Last July I broke my ribs and they eventually healed and I was pain-free. In about June I started getting tenderness where I had hurt my ribs for no reason at all. I mentioned it to the doctor in August and she felt it was OK and nothing to worry about. Some days it would be worse than others. Then it began to spread and rather than just being in a small spot on my right side at the bottom of my rib cage it started to spread round the side and to the back and it started to be more and more persistent. It didn't feel muscular and it was very very tender if pressed. Then at the weekend the pain and tenderness spread to my breast bone as well. So I got a doctor's appointment yesterday expecting him to say yes it was rib pain and it would go and take more paracetamol. 

It was a doctor I hadn't seen before and he was very nice. He listened to my concerns and then examined me carefully. One of the first things he said was' what is the scar on your back from?' I told him it was a malignant melanoma removed 5 years ago. He checked my lungs etc which he said sounded fine and then he checked my ribs and abdomen all over and it hurt. He then sat me down and said that it didn't seem muscular but either bone pain or nerve pain and the next step was an urgent referral for a chest x-ray. I questioned urgent and he said in light of my medical history he wanted that checked as soon as possible. I asked Nigel, who was in the waiting room, to come in, and we discussed his concerns. He agreed the melanoma was a red flag and that whilst everything was probably Ok it needed to be checked as a priority. So I left in a very different frame of mind than I entered and in a bit of shock really as I wasn't expecting that scenario. Nigel keeps telling me - and I know he is right - that they have to cover themselves and that it is unlikely to be anything wrong but they have to check etc etc. I keep alternating between worst-case scenario and thinking it is all a waste of people's time. I had my urgent chest x-ray this morning and will hear results in a couple of days. If you can, keep me in your thoughts and the odd prayer wouldn't go amiss either, please.

Consequently I haven't really been able to settle to anything today.

 

I did make this yesterday though - a lovely picture of Nigel and his Mom who is increasingly 'absent' as the dementia steals more and more of her away.

 

 

 I used more Indigo and ivy and it was made for ATDML.

 

 

 

Today I am thankful for

• the speed of our NHS which is terrific when it needs to be
• the care of NHS staff - they were lovely as always today and I watched nurses and ancillary staff be so kind to so many people and so patient with them
• faith - it's so key!

 

In news this week

So a bit of a catch up from this week.

We have been to the cinema three times - it was a bit of a catch-up time as lots of new films we wanted to see were out.

Last week we had seen IT 2 which I thought was quite good and Downton Abbey which we both enjoyed a lot. Not so lucky this week.

First up was The Informer which was just about OK but no more than that really. Next up was Hustlers which neither of us enjoyed and we almost left. The trailer had made it look quite good. It wasn't. I actively disliked Jennifer Lopez and it was just too sleazy and you had no empathy for any of the characters. And then we saw Ad Astra. Nigel is a space buff so it had promise... me I just went for the eye candy of Brad Pitt and yes he is older, so am I! It still works for me! The film was grim. Far too many long close-ups and pregnant pauses plus an unbelievable story. Nigel hated it. I was happy there was eye candy because the story did nothing. Hey ho! You win some you lose some.

The weather has been utterly gorgeous - truly gorgeous. Warm and brilliant sunshine, though today when we went to the beach there was a heck of breeze and quite choppy waters.

It was beautiful though. Whilst there we sipped our first - and last - Pumpkin Spice frappe. We were keen to try it but whilst it wasn't horrible, it wasn't for us.

 

 

 

 

 

 and this - my friends - is what an award-winning beach looks like and I am sorry to my friends in Bournemouth, but Poole beaches are so much better - the sand is gorgeous and quite different ... yes, I am biased - I love my home town.

 

 

In other news still, I have been making a mini-book. I was following a brilliant step by step tutorial by Cal Summers from Scraplab and it was an absolutely brilliant tutorial.

 I have made similar mini books before but the tips and guidance for this one were superb and it is a really strong, sturdy book, a good size taking full 6 x 4 pictures if you want and with space for literally dozens of photos. I can't wait to fill it. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Today I am thankful for

• living by the ocean
• cinema club even when they are not fab
• felting - a bit of a new craze

 

 

Prayers answered and all is good

I have been having a pretty rotten time with my health recently - not to share too much information my insides are a little messed up and there have been days when I have been unable to leave the house - well leave the bathroom really - and the terrible cramps have left me in tears. I just assumed it was my IBS acting up, though it had never been that bad, and I battled with it for a couple of months but in the end, Nigel said I had to go and see the doctor and I did. She was wonderful except she scared the living daylights out of me because having googled, very thoroughly, colon cancer and bowel cancer, I had clearly missed ovarian cancer off my Doctor Google checklists and that was the one she wanted me screened for. Oh and full blood count, liver function, kidney function, glucose etc. However, she also gave me new medication for the IBS which, apart from causing a very low-grade tummy ache much of the time, has helped enormously. I was dreading today to get the results and had pretty much convinced myself I would have  a high marker for the ovarian cancer test and diabetes at least, all my tests were clear and so it must just (and I say just though it is still horrid) IBS which is NOT life-threatening, is not serious and I can learn to live with. I have battled it for the last 30 years or so and especially the last 5 years since I had campylobacter which made it so much worse and which never fully returned to normal. So I am a happy happy lady. My prayers were answered and I am so grateful. I am getting used to popping a cocktail of pills and, if that is the answer I can happily live with that to avoid all the other things.

 

Sorry to have bored you with health issues. On to prettier things

 

I was thrilled to be asked to be a guest designer for UK Scrapaddicts and work with their sketch this month.

This is what I created

 

 

 

 

 

This was another page made for two challenges - one at UKS and one at Mind the Scrap

 

 

as was this one

 

Today I have so very very much to be thankful for  I don't know where to begin really

• thankful for my faith which sees me through good times and bad
• thankful for my wonderful husband who cares about me and mops up the tears when needed. He is always by my side through good and bad and whilst he is a bloke and so has 'sharing' issues, I know he cares very deeply
• thankful for our wonderful NHS - in the space of a week two doctor visits, full blood tests and results and new medication
• life - it's pretty wonderful you know! 

Oh my - awesomely good

Yesterday we went to see the new live-action Lion King - well CGI action I guess.

 

I was very apprehensive as The Lion King is one of my favourite ever Disney films. I hoped they hadn't messed with it.

 

I can honestly say it was the best film I have seen this year - and we go at least once a week. It was awesome. It was so real, it was so subtle, it was so true tot he original. The few small tweaks were very good and - no spoilers - but one made me laugh out loud. The only sad thing was the cinema needed to up the volume a bit and although Mufassah was James Earl Jones it didn't sound like him.

Do go and see it

It was amazing

 

Official trailer to whet your appetite

 

 

 

 

I have also managed digital and paper scrapping. I am trying to finish the Fabulous Fall photo book and have a fair bit to do before my credits tun out.

I had nothing on Concord so these were two missing pages

 

 

 

I also made this today which was for a colour challenge and a sketch challenge (Love multi-tasking like that)

 

The photo was taken just a week ago

 

 

Today I am thankful for

• a lovely few days just enjoying retirement
• my cats - some days I am just overwhelmed by how lucky we have been with them
• the Lion King - awesome

 

and a little bit of Disney wisdom to end with

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Thank goodness for a great health service

It was quite a day yesterday.

First thing in the morning Nigel just casually dropped into conversation that he thought he might get his eye checked out! He said he had developed a huge floater like a spider's web in his right eye yesterday and it hadn't gone overnight and so he thought he might like to get it checked.

Um -yes!

We both knew that a change like that, a sudden increase in floaters etc, was a warning sign of something like a torn retina or even worse a risk of a detached retina. We got up straight away and went to Poole.

We figured, rightly, our best shot was the optician where Nigel knows the manager at Specsavers well. He was fab and booked us in for a couple of hours later with one of the specialists there. We went back and Nigel was dilated and examined and yes, he had a possible tear and so they phoned the hospital and checked us in there. A drive across from Poole to the Eye Hospital in Bournemouth (highlighting the fact that when the two hospitals merge and Poole loses its A and E department people are NOT going to survive that journey if they are critically ill - but that is another story)

The hospital was fabulous and we were seen within the hour. They confirmed a small tear which had taken a bit off the disc at the back and so it would need to be lasered which acts as a sort of welded seal to stop any more fluid leaking and stop a detached retina. It sounded horrible but Nigel said it wasn't bad. It was a bit scary but it didn't hurt. His eye is safe now but the big floater is still there and whilst it might lessen a little it is unlikely to go away however his brain should learn to compensate for it.

Once again we are left amazed by the quality of our NHS, the service we received, the care of everyone involved, their kindness and their expertise. We are truly lucky in this country and yet again we cannot speak highly enough of the NHS. 

No scrapping yesterday but I do have new things to share

 

This is a page documenting the amazing PATH station at World Trade Centre - it looked like a dove of peace

It was breathtaking

 

 

This is a page about St Augustine and how pretty the huge number of B and Bs were

 

and this is another page made for A Trip Down Memory Lane using Simple Stories Simply Vintage Botanical and shows Thomas Hardy's cottage in our home county. Love Dorset!

 

 

 

Today I am thankful for

• a happy and positive resolution yesterday
• great stuff to play with from such super people at A Trip Down memory Lane
• retirement - we were able to deal with yesterday without any letting people down at work. For that we are both so grateful.

 

 

Happy 18th and 21st birthday

Ok

I am the first to admit it might seem a little odd at my age to be celebrating my 18th and 21st  birthday - but such is life.

 

Let me explain.

 

When I was 18 my mom and dad bought me a beautiful gold bracelet made of three colour gold links. It was beautiful. I wore it rarely as it was 'for best' For my 21st birthday they bought me an antique gold necklace with an antique locket. I wore it every day but I lost it - somewhere between Thurrock cycle speedway track and the toilets in South Mimms service station. It had been a filthy daya nd I was in layers - all wet. We stopped ont he way home at the services to go to the toilet and when I was in the cubicle the chain dropped on the floor. Clearly it had broken at some point and fallen down inside my clothes. I stipped - everything - in that cubicle but I couldn't find the locket anywhere. Two other ladies helped me. But we never found it. I reported it and with the insurance money I eventually bought another gold necklace. It was never the same.

 

About twelve years ago I stopped wearing gold. I have no real idea why. I just didn't like it any more. And eventually - for my 25th -Nigel even bought me a new wedding ring and engagement ring when we renewed our vows that were platinum. I only ever wear silver jewellery. And not a lot of that!

I had always - for years and years - wanted a Tiffany bracelet. Now we are not 'designer' people. I don't think between us we own anything that is 'designer' or expensive. It just doesn't float our boat. I have friends who have designer bags and shoes and clothes but it's just not us. We are not interested. Apart from a Tiffany necklace. We went to Tiffany in New York back in the 90s and the only thing we could afford to buy was a Tiffany pen (which was beautiful)  But I had always wanted a Tiffany silver bracelet but of course I'd never buy one - such a waste of money and the one I bought from a craft market for £20 worked just as well - almost!

A couple of months ago I decided to sell all of my gold jewellery - I never wore it, it sat in a drawer as a reminder I never wore it. So I sold it and decided that with some of the proceeds I would buy that Tiffany bracelet - an 18th and 21st birthday present from Mommy and Daddy. I knew they would approve of me having something I would wear everyday instead of something that sat in a  drawer.

Yesterday Nigel took me up to Tiffany in London and we picked my bracelet and it was such a lovely experience. The staff were lovely (I was worried they'd realise we were not 'real' Tiffany customers and not be very nice. They were loevly. And I LOVE my 18th and 21st birthday present and the perfume I also got.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Simple things really - but the fulfillment of a dream. Thank you for my birthday present Mommy and Daddy

 

And in other news - some new scrapping.

A digital page for a challenge on Pickleberrypop

 

 

and the first page for my DT work for A Trip Down memory Lane this month using Simple Stories Sunshine nd Blue Skies.

 

 

 

 

Today I am thankful for

• a fabulous day fulfilling a dream

 

 

Celebrating us

Happy 33rd wedding anniversary to us!

Nothing big this year - but a nice trip out in the sunshine this morning - which has gone now. A hobble around Wimborne and a visit to the Minster to thank God for the blessings of each other. An ice cream in the sun and we were done.

I count myself so blessed to have married my best friend and I truly am thankful every single day. We have done some amazing things, seen some amazing places, but the best bit has been the ordinary everyday life together.

Just started dating - trip to America - start of a lifelong love for each other - and America

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

and us today - 33 years on, certainly older, maybe not much wiser, but even closer.

 

 

 

 

 

 

I better share some of the scrapping stuff too eh!

 

This is the title page for the Fabulous Fall album. I never do title pages first - it takes me a while to get into the zone.

 

 

 

Nigel being a good student in the Amish one-room school house

 

 

Skilled costumed craftsmen at Jamestown Settlement.

 

 

Today I am thankful for

• waiting patiently for Nigel for quite a few years! Proves all good things come to those who wait.
• Being best friends for almost all of my life.
• a perfect marriage -we do the mundane, we travel, we work, we care for our home, we argue, we play, we do our own hobbies, we parent our fur babies but most of all, we love and we laugh, every single day.

 

 

well look at the ups and downs of life

The last time I posted I was full of the joys of spring - quite literally. We had had an amazing day out and I was so thrilled by my life.

As it happened - I am even more thrilled but in a different way.

 

Not half an hour after I posted I suddenly had chest pains and they got steadily worse. I felt sure they were not my heart but the pain int he centre of my chest was intense and after two hours where it was getting worse and worse we decided to go have it checked out.

 

We are so blessed to have a wonderful national health service in this country.

 

Nigel dropped me off at the door to A and E and went to park. By the time he had parked, I had been triaged and was already in a  cubicle. I explained I felt sure it was not heart-related but just felt I ought to get it checked and was very apologetic. They were lovely and said NEVER leave chest pains, ever.

 

They were lovely and apart from a couple of hitches, it was all very smooth. I had an ECG almost straight off and was given morphine. Then we hit a snag. A and E policy is stick a cannula in so they can get whatever samples they want. It's the sensible and usually the easiest option. One procedure and then the cannula is there for whatever they need. Um - not so good if you are me. Getting blood out of me for even a blood test is a heck of a procedure. I have been told over the years all sorts of things. I have 'deep veins', I have 'small veins' I have 'wiggly veins'. I think it could be summed up by just saying I have crappy veins actually. Anyway, the nurse came to take the blood and said she was going to do a cannula. I explained I had very tricky veins and she didn't really listen but said she liked a challenge. Now bear in mind at this point I was sitting down. Tip one - never do a medical procedure on me unless I am lying - I am a fainter.

She tried my arm, my wrist - no joy - so hit the back of my hand. The worst place for me really. The worst place for my veins too. Apparently, they collapse real easy in my hand. Nigel stood by me and held my hand and oh my goodness it hurt like hell. For a long time. And I got fainter and fainter and sicker and sicker and apparently whiter than white. Even poor Nigel who was watching looked uncomfortable and said it was horrible as she forced it in and wiggled and pulled and pressed and he said he was sure the needle was going to come out of the other side. He said (I don't look) it was a very big needle. Anyway, she failed. She got some blood out for the blood test but the canula failed and the bruise is massive and it still hurts like mad now. I had water and sick bowls and gradually the colour started to come back.

We were about another hour and a half before the doctor came (he had had to wait for the lab result on the blood)  to tell me the ECG was clear he didn't think it was my heart but the blood had clotted before the lab tested it as it had been a poor sample and so it had to be repeated. I was tearful at the thought of another cannula but he listened and said he would do it himself and he would just take blood and not try a cannula. He did get blood but even he struggled and I have another massive bruise on the other arm. He then said  I had to have a chest x-ray, another ECG and then I would be transferred to the acute admissions ward to await the result. I was very sad. I was sure it wasn't heart. The ECG was clear and I wanted to go home.

I did bump into another doctor who recognised me and was a past pupil so it was lovely to chat with her.

Anyway - chest x-ray done, ECG done, all obs done and I was moved - by wheelchair (no need I could walk but it is procedure) to acute admissions and told to get into bed. I explained I wasn't staying so as a compromise I lay in the bed. After another hour or so the bloods were back and another doctor saw me and said they were clear, it wasn't heart but they thought it was costocondritis.

This is from the web site

Costochondritis is the medical term for inflammation of the cartilage that joins your ribs to your breastbone (sternum). This area is known as the costochondral joint.

When the costochondral joint becomes inflamed it can result in sharp chest pain and tenderness, which may develop gradually or start suddenly.

The pain may be made worse by:

• a particular posture – such as lying down
• pressure on your chest – such as wearing a seatbelt or hugging someone
• deep breathing, coughing and sneezing

physical activity

can be difficult to tell the difference between the chest pain associated with costochondritis and pain caused by more serious conditions, such as a heart attack.

Costochondritis may improve on its own after a few weeks, although it can last for several months or more. The condition doesn't lead to any permanent problems, but may sometimes relapse.

It's not known exactly why the costochondral joint becomes inflamed, but in some cases ,it's been linked to:

• • • an injury to your chest
    • physical strain from repeated exercise or sudden exertion that you're not used to – such as moving furniture
    • an infection – including respiratory tract infections (RTIs) and wound infections
    • wear and tear – your chest moves in and out 20 to 30 times a minute, and over time this motion can lead to discomfort in these joints

Before a diagnosis can be confirmed, some tests may need to be carried out to rule out other possible causes of your chest pain.

These may include:

• • • an electrocardiogram (ECG) – which records the rhythms and electrical activity of your heart
    • a blood test to check for signs of underlying inflammation
    • a chest X-ray

If no other condition is suspected or found, a diagnosis of costrochondritis may be made. Costochondritis often gets better after a few weeks, but self-help measures and medication can manage the symptoms.

 

So there we go. I was finally home after nidnight, sore, shattered, doped up on morphine and relieved. Life really is good. A little bit of pain is a msall price to be paid for NOT having somethingt he matter with my heart and, yet again, the NHS are wonderful.

 

I spent most of Wednesday out of it as the morphine really doesn't agree with me and I felt dreadful (I'd never make an addict) but today I feel so much better and am so grateful.

 

I have new scrapping to share too

 

This was another for a cyber crop challenge - a very old photo of Nigel and I. The challenge involved quirky and we were certainly quirky in this. It was our first christmas together back in 1983

 

 

and this was to use an oversized element - this was a great cut file and is another for the Fabulous Fall album - which is now three albums!

 

 

Today I am thankful for

• our NHS
• doctors, nurses, receptionists, porters - all wonderful
• Nigel - my support - always

 

 

In Memory of My Friend

You will all remember that my good friend Dawn Inskip passed away suddenly last year. There are still many days when it just hits me and I think of her so often.

I wanted to scrap something special but couldn't think what and how and then I saw a page posted for inspiration on FTLOPP and I knew I had to scraplift it for Dawn.

 

The defining thing that always stood out with her designs was the colour. I am a vanilla person ... I fear bright colours (not that you'd believe it if you saw my car!) and Dawn's designs always made me explore so much more than I would have done. They were bright and vibrant and lush and so this was the perfect page for a tribute to her. 

 

It took an age to find and cut all the coloured petals, ink them, punch the stars and circles, but it was very therapeutic. The photo is Nigel and I on her bench on the day we went up with Paul and Carly to unveil the bench.

I think Dawn would have approved!

 

 

In addition, I have been painting today.

Our focus at art this month has been to look at pop art - not a genre I like or really understand.

I have had a couple of dabbles but this one - copied not my own design, but obviously painted myself and made my own a little - I was quite pleased with.

Works better if you are further away from it and squinting helps too.

 

Very interesting exercise in negative space. Doubly proud as I painted it in acrylics which I hate using. 

 

 

Today I am thankful for

• the friendship I had with Dawn
• colour
• people who share inspiration so generously
• the scrapping community I am so proud to be a part of 
• time to be able to create

 

 

Just forgot

We have had a very interesting mix of days ranging from very busy too so chilled we did nothing and, as a result, I just forgot to blog. Clean went right out of my head. It is that simple.

 

I have caught up with a friend I used to work with, which was lovely. She loaned me the three Jeffrey Archer Prison Diaries and that is part of the problem. I have just been busy devouring them. It's been a long time since I have read three books in three days! They were very interesting reading. 

We went to visit Alice's new babies - two adorable little kittens we fell immediate;y in love with. They are beyond cute. She wanted two sisters so badly and they have found a wonderful fur-ever home. 

We went to see Bumblebee at the cinema which was OK - just a bit of a filler really, and we have been for lots of walks and caught up with the latest seasons of Suits.

 

Today I tried to sort my patterned papers but to be honest, it was too daunting a task really. I have way way too much stuff. Far too much paper. I need to start making a dent in it and NOT buying any more.

The room looks tidier and I have at least familiarised myself with some supplies I had forgotten and will now use.

I do have a couple of pages to share though.

 

The first was made for the template challenge over at Pickleberrypop and showcases the incredible Roundabout Diner we loved so much. We have since heard people travel from quite a distance to visit it so we were very lucky it was, quite literally, on our doorstep.

 

 

This page is paper and one I am actually really pleased with.

The side of the building in the first picture is our hotel and we were on the hotel deck taking the pictures. You can see what an amazing view it was.

The lower photo was sat at what would be our table for dinner, so you can see what the view was like from the dining room. I would recommend anyone to stay there. It was amazing.

 

 

Today I am thankful for

• a tidier craft room
• a new year resolution to NOT buy new stuff other than essentials like glue and ink.
• Chilled days - love retirement (Though I am invigilating again later this month)