Dolly's Dreamings

Worn out and anniversaries

I have been too tired to blog to be honest.

I am struggling at the moment with the anniversaries of things. Thursday - the 16th - is the anniversary of being diagnosed with breast cancer and that seems to make it all so much more real again. I have been battling with lymphoedema and a lot of breast pain and I am worried about the impending mammogram which is soon - the one year anniversary of surgery. I think the fear never goes away. They got rid of the cancer (hopefully for good but none of us have that as a given) but the damage to your mental health never seems to go.

Sorry for the depressed start. I do always say this is my honest brain dump and maybe if we all spoe out about our worries it would help.

 

I was exhausted after a craft fair on Sunday. It was a busy fair and after not having done fairs last year due to cancer it has taken me a while to get back into the swing of things. I have said that once my stock has gone, that is me over and done for craft fairs. I have been doing them for about 11 years and let's face it, noone who does craft fairs is going to break even let alone make money, well not unless you are selling hugely expensive things. I have to sell a lot of £3 bookmarks and £4 plaques! However, it enabled me to justify making things which is the bit I enjoy and the stock is gradually going down. For the first time ever I took paintings with me. Nigel had made me a back board for a big craft fair I have in December and so I took that for the first (and to be honest I think ONLY) time. I did sell two paintings but they were ones not on display on the board just in a display stand Nigel made (he really is very handy) I'm far more at ease just having my usual table of stuff.

 

 

I was really exhausted at the end of the day and we had a very quiet day yesterday. I did scrap though with pictures I took at lunchtime

 

 

I couldn't resist the title

 

 

 

Today I am thankful for

• rest
• prayer and faith
• my three boys - one skin and two fur!

Back in the saddle

I have missed out on a fair bit of design team work over the past few months as I haven't been up to it, but I am back on my horse again now and I have a class over at A Trip Down memory Lane this weekend.

You can buy a kit or use your own stash and there are three pages with full instructions on their website.

This is one of the class pages

 

 

 

 

 

 

It's been drier today (though just starting to spit and spot now - and so we went out for a little drive and then called in and bought some new shrubs and compost and had an almost pleasant time in the garden. We are NOT gardeners and Nigel has to be dragged out kicking and screaming really. But the three plants are in (they replace ones we lost last year and I expect these will die too but heck!) the pots are redressed with gravel and the patio furniture is back out. Slowly slowly.

I start Radiotherapy this week and confess to being a bit nervous. I know they have to give you worst case scenario all the time but goodness me it is horrible what can happen, but hopefully won't.

I will be glad when this is all done and then I only have the medication to worry about. I still don't know what I will do when my 6 week break is up.

I have done two bird painting this week and there will be more as it is a challenge at a facebook group I play along with this week.

These were last week's efforts - I prefer the woodpecker without the background. I ruined it with the background

 

 

 

 

Today I am thankful for

• a lovely Sunday
• Spring in the air

 

Let's stick to scrapping

OK - this post is going to be pretty much about scrapping because life hasn't been fab to be honest. Every random illness that could have hit me has hit me, I feel lousy and so let's move on!

 

In happy news we became a great Aunt and Great Uncle yesterday. That sounds awfully grand and awfully old. Our neice delivered a little baby boy very quickly and very safely and we are thrilled for them.

I have been scrapping - slowly - and some bits were made pre-op too. So here we go

Journal day 14

 

 

Journal day 15

 

 

 

It was my DT slot at The Flair Hut Today and this was made for that and also used yesterday's sketch by Lisa at Scrap a Sketch (made before I was ill)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

And finally - because I can  - some gorgeous pictures of our wonderful boys

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Today I am thankful for

friends to listen to me

Nigel - I couldn't do any of this hell without him

a new baby in the family and another on the way

 

 

Storm Eunice - not nice at all

I remember the hurricane of 1987 vividly. We had not long been married and they had the good grace to call it a hurricane. Storm Eunice has been billed as the worst storm to hit us in more than 3 decades. I sincerely hope it is another 3 before the next one.

 

Today the south coast (and it is moving north now) has been battered by Storm Eunice and the winds have been approximately 90 miles per hour. But apparently it is just a storm. I think maybe the difference is it gusts up to not a constant 97 mph. I don't think we or the trees would have survived a constant. The gusts were bad enough. Roads all over the town have been closed due to flooding and trees down. But hey - the world's weather isn't changing! Global warning is just a hoax!! I think not!

 

 

 

However all schools in the county were told to close, people were told to work from home, the first-ever Red alert was issued by the Met Office and it's been pretty scary to be honest.

Thankfully we didn't lose any trees though have lost three big branches which thankfully didn't hit the house or fences. Two came off and sailed over the heath, one in the garden plus we have a high branch hanging by a thread but the tree surgeons will have to come back to move it because it is high and I fear that the whole tree will have to go.

We were very naughty - though we did it very safely - and went to see the ocean in the storm. We stayed away from anywhere dangerous but the beach was amazing.

 

 

 

 

 

The videos are far more dramatic

I would imagine Bournemouth Beach has a lot more sand than it did yesterday and Poole has a lot less

 

 

 

 

and another

 

 

Shore road was closed due to flooding and was the most dramatic we have seen and bear in mind that is in the harbour - usually reasonably calm

 

 

 

The river is the promenade we usually walk on

 

and no I was on foot not in a car

 

 

Thankfully the winds have now dropped to a milk 60 - 70 mph so it seems quite calm!

 

What do you do when the weather is so awful and you are scared of trees from the garden coming down? Why you scrap of course!

 

 

This was such a special page to make. Indy was born on the day our beloved Fiki died  and we are utterly convinced there is a bit of Fiki in him. We knew they looked alike but yesterday morning Indy was on the bed and wrapped round Nigels hand to sleep and I snapped a picture and knew I must have photos of Fiki doing the same as he too used to do it. So this page was born. The large photo is Indy and the smaller Fiki. Two peas in a pod.

 

 

 

 

 

 

And yesterday I made 4 pages for part of my Design Team work for A Trip Down Memory Lane (full disclosure - I get the materials for free)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Phew that was a mammoth post today

 

I hope if you are in the UK the storm hasn't caused you any problems and let's hope for calmer days ahead.

 

Today I am thankful for

the branches that came down, huge as they were, not doing damage

a safe warm dry home

all of my Bengal babies and regular moggies past and present.

 

 

Just a quick post

I was reminded today - by Nigel no less - that I hadn't blogged. At least it shows he does read it to see what his wife has been up to!

 

I am still having breathing issues but am incredibly impressed that I am having a chest x ray tomorrow only 5 days after referral. I know everything says the NHS is under huge pressure but I think that is pretty good. Mind you, the precautions one has to follow are huge. You wait outside, you tell them when you arrive, you wear no jewellery or bra just a  plain t shirt so you don't even have to undress and they come to the car park to fetch you, you go straight in, photo and out. How incredibly efficient is that!

 

I have little new scrapping to share as much of what I have been doing is for guest DT slots next month which I am very very excited by

 

This was for a Scrap a Sketch challenge and I found it hard to scrap as it records my departed fur babies who have crossed to Rainbow Bridge but are Never forgotten.

 

 

 

 

 

and this is one to record how proud I am of our boyz. They are used on social media in an advert for the cat food we use - amazing cat food I have to say. It has transformed them. It's not cheap but it looks like real food and they thrive on it. I get a thrill every time I see the advert with the boyz on. Hot off the press for a UKS challenge and a Rediscover your stash ... something that makes me happy

 

 

 

 

 

Look at them!

 

 

Am very proud of my boyz (all three of them - just 2 of them are cuter and furrier)

 

Today I am thankful for

• a speedy hospital appointment
• progress on my next pencil drawing - my goodness they are slow to do
• scrappy time
• all of my fur babies, past and present. They have all been different and have all brought joy.

 

It's officially Christmas

It is officially Christmas.

The blog header has changed so it must be true. Mary thank you for the reminder - I had clean forgotten!!!

 

Plus the first mince pie has been eaten so that proves it.

 

I have been scrapping again today.

We went for a walk - bitterly cold but beautiful - at the beach today and the surf dudes have a Christmas tree up - too cute not to scrap.

So it became the focus of my Day 2 page (a Scrap Squad sketch) but it also lifts up for more photos.

 

 

 

 

The page also documents how it is a year to the day since we said goodbye to our beloved little girl Kira. We have lost 6 fur babies - Cinders, Simba, Pebble, Boushka, Fiki and Kira - and I think Kira hit me the hardest as there was seemingly nothing major wrong with her physically but she had just given up and wanted to be with her brother. She was my special little girl and will always be missed so much. She was such a little fighter through several issues and I loved her so much

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I also scrapped today's prompt at DAF and Scrap a Sketch

Almost a year ago - the day we brought the boys home. December will always be a month tinged with happiness and sadness combined.

 

 

 

and still working with Stuff your Stocking kit

 

This was made with a mini by Heather T available FWP tomorrow only with purchases of $5 or more and her own shop is all discounted tomorrow

 

Today I am thankful for

• having had precious Kira for 17 wonderful years
• beach walks
• scrapping time

 

It's Official and a sad farewell

It s now finally official. Nigel fully retired last week and I was contacted today about the next round of invigilation and we discussed it and - I am now fully fully retired.

 

Yey - it's a great feeling.

 

We have been busy preparing for the Boyz birthday tomorrow - all will be revealed tomorrow. But suffice to say we have both made things and mine are small and Nigel's are anything BUT. It will be worth the wait for the laughs alone. Poor Boyz won't know what has hit them.

I do, however, want to write this today as I want to focus on the positives tomorrow when the boyz turn 1. A year ago tomorrow, as the boys were being born, we lost our first ever boy, our beloved Fiki. He had been poorly for a few weeks and had several vert visits and the vet was trying different things to help his breathing. He was still happy, still playing, albeit briefly, but breathing was becoming a struggle. We had been away for a lovely day out with Carly and Paul and returned home about 6 to find him very unwell. we watched him for half an hour or so and decided we needed to go to the emergency vets. He was really struggling with breathing and was very tired. On the way there we discussed what our options might be and we both decided that at 17 we did not want to put him through any invasive treatments to prolong his life for what we knew would be a short time.

The emergency vet was lovely and took him off to examine him. She came back about 15 minutes later and told us he was very sick. It was, in all likelihood, a soft tissue tumour but his lungs were full of fluid. She told us they could put him under and aspirate the fluid but the likleihood was, if he made it through the procedure, they would fill up within a couple of weeks. She was relieved when we told her that was not the end we wanted for our beloved boy. They were wonderful. Under Covid rules, we couldn't go in to a vets unless it was to say goodbye. They put a cannula in and then called us in. He was on his bedding, canula ready and she said she would leave the room so we could remove our masks and say a proper goodbye, which we did. Masks back on we were able to hold him as he quietly passed and we brought our beloved boy home for the last time. We were in shock. It was so sudden and whilst no time would ever have been enough this was so harsh. I think we both wept all night, and it also marked the end for Kira who, over the coming weeks, simply gave up without her brother.

Fiki was once called the most famous cat in the scrapbooking world. Everyone in my little world of scrapping knew him. He was a larger than life character; naughty, daring, irrepresible and so so handsome. He was the only boy we had ever had and was so very loving. So many people sent things when we lost him, from gorgeous tree ornaments from our good friend Mike in Florida, beautifully engraved cats from Ann, flowers and so many many messages. He had touched many people and we will never ever forget our beautiful naughty Bengal boy. The boyz have helped to heal our hearts a little but they were never intended nor could they ever be replacements. And Indy grows more and more like Fiki every day. We say he has the face of an angel. He really does - a Fiki angel.

Today I am thankful that we were blessed to have Fiki share our lives and we will never ever forget him.

 

I leave you with our Fiki

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Some gorgeous weather

Down here on the coast we were one of the few parts of the country that seemed not to have snow. I love snow and it would have been nice, but we have had some gorgeous sunny weather and some beautiful walks.  Beach walks

 

 

 

 

 

and woodland walks

 

 

 

 

 

 

So cold but beautiful

Talking of beautiful - today's loveliness is this ...

Little Indy and Mummy playing with her iPhone

 

 

 

Barb I am so pleased that maybe now you can look forward to a more settled period in the US. I hope a steadying hand not he tiller instead of a lunatic will be so good for you nd for the country.

Today we have been yet again kitten proofing areas of the house.  Nigel has built a brilliant infill for behind the TV to stop the babies destroying wires.

 

And some new painting to share - I have no idea why I wanted to paint a kingfisher (picture was taken from Wikipedia) 

 

And finally some scrapping

A digital page of a photo from Friday at the beach

 

 

This box he is in is tiny (so is he) but I have no idea how he gets in  and then turns round inside it

 

 

 

and finally this one made today with no bought embellishments or patterned paper just watercolour flowers I painted and a watercolour border.

 

 

 

Today I am thankful for

• a very supportive husband and best friend. I am truly truly blessed
• beautiful crisp clear weather
• daily exercise
• hobbies

 

 

 

Belated Merry Christmas

 

Well a very belated Merry Christmas from all of us here – it’s been lovely and very different.

The kittens are making good progress but we are very glad – sounds boastful – that they came to live with us as I am sure a lot of other people wouldn’t have been prepared to put the time and patience into what they need. They are extremely shy – especially Koda, and they just need lots and lots of love, patience and reassurance. They are both eating well and playing constantly but are still a little hestitant with us though Indy had mega fusses from both of us throughout the day today. They are reluctant to lave their room and we are now leaving the door open all the time and spent much of our Christmas playing games sat on the floor in the hallway in an effort to encourage them out. They have started to explore – very tentatively. They are extremely loving cats and we know that, with patience and reassurance, they will come out of themselves and be gorgeous fur babies. I have to say I am disappointed with the breeder. They seem not to have been played with and interacted with at all. It seems they associated humans with food and going to the vets. The first two days they would hide when we got the food ready – I suspect that’s what they did there too. Now they are rubbing all over us trying to get it more quickly. They are both happy to be hand fed fresh turkey too and will come and sit on our knee to have that little treat. Coupled with the fact they were with their Mum much longer than normal it is amazing they are adjusting as well as they our. Kira and Fiki had been raised in a family home, literally, and were so brave and confident. It’s been hard for our little boys, but we will get there together. We have the rest of their lives to reassure them that they are safe and loved and can relax. One thing I had forgotten though – and it came back to both of us really quickly – is how windy kittens are and how smelly that wind is. Bless them! It’s a good job we love them to bits.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Christmas day was lovely. It is the first Christmas Day that we have been able to open some of our presents. Usually we are either hosting lots of people so busy or visiting the care home straight after church. So this year was lovely. We played with the kittens and fed them then watched a beautiful service from our church and the other churches on the heath – we were worried not being in church on Christmas Day would feel awful but the service was so uplifting and so well done.

We followed that with presents and champagne and both had lovely gifts. Nigel was very moved by the cat bead in memory of Kira and Fiki.

We gave the kittens their gifts but had to scale them back as it was sensory overload for them. They did like their new Gingerbread house though and the present from Miss Jessie.

We had a very late lunch at about 4 pm which was yummy and then a relaxing evening.

Boxing Day was an almost exact repeat for us and we had more lovely gifts. I was especially thrilled that I am now officially a resident at Grey Sloan Memorial.

We enjoyed a very nice very cold socially distanced hot chocolate with the neighbours in our drive – we are blessed to have such lovely neighbours.

Today we have again spent much time encouraging the kittens – well Koda really as Indy is so much more confident and likes his fuss.

I also caught up with my journal.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I also made these for two challenges at Pickleberrypop (yes the kittens will be featuring a fair bit)

 

 

 

Today I amt thankful

• enjoying Christmas together
• our new babies - a way to go yet but our love will win them round

 

Our boys are here

We have waited and waited for today

We set off at 5 am to go and fetch out baby boys. We had a full risk assessment in case we were stopped because although we were travelling from a  tier 2 to a tier 2 we did have to drive through a tier 3 and a tier 4 area, though we did not leave the car.

The boys are spectacularly beautiful. Indy is much lighter than Koda and much braver and – dare I say it – a little reckless. Koda is very quiet but very determined.

The cat carrier proved to be an issue and Indy got himself into quite a state. He is much smaller than Koda and could get his legs through and I was worried he was going to break a leg so he was taken out of the carrier and swaddled on my knee to calm him down. It worked a treat and he spent the next 3 hours on my knee, looking round but sitting nicely, or fast asleep. Twenty minutes after he left the carrier he was joined by shy Koda who sat beautifully all the way too. Photos from the journey home

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

It has been a traumatic day and whilst they were happy to sit on a stranger in the car they have left their mummy and are very disorientated as we expected so they have hidden in the cat carrier and a bed in their new room. We have sat in silence with them. They have food and water and litter, but we know they have to adjust in their own time as they have had a very stressful day. And they are tired.

We can’t wait to get to know them properly and learn all about these two little characters who are going to fill the hole in our hearts.

 

 

Today I am thankful for

• our two new babies to love
• the babies we have lost who will never be forgotten

Final preparations

It seems like we have been getting ready for kittens for a while now and we made the last big final preparation today. We have open bannisters and when Kira and Fiki were little they used to fly around the house and we worried about them falling through the bannisters and all the way down to the bottom so we covered the stairs. We lived with the bright yellow plastic for six months until they grew. This time we bought much more aesthetically pleasing clear plastic and our stairs are now again protected for little baby cats. The things we do for love.

We had a lovely get together with the neighbours - on zoom of course - last night and celebrated as we always do. We usually go for a meal with the three closest houses, but this year we celebrated on line with a quiz and a few drinks and nibbles.

Sadly the either is bad and so no viewing of the Christmas star here - clouds are way too thick.

I have scrapping to share and Freda the regency photos were from Weymouth.

I have been lucky to work with Simple Stories Jingle all the way from A Trip Down Memory Lane and have this page celebrating he gorgeous wooden ornaments Ann sent in remembrance of Kira and Fiki

 

 

 

 

 

I have also caught up with my December journal

 

 

 

 

 

Today I am thankful for

• preparations complete
• almost time to have out babies and bring some joy
• good neighbours