Creative days and worries

I have had a lovely few creative days and I am trying to focus on the loveliness of that and not on the worries.

 

Breast Cancer is the gift that keeps on giving. I am at my anniversary of my mammogram and later this week will be one year since my call back letter which indicated that most times it is absolutely nothing at all. The worry never goes away. The fear never goes away and the anniversaries don't help. I had my next mammogram appointment booked and it was so not when I wanted it. It is early December and that must be just about the worst time. It will take two weeks for the results which means if I get a call back it will be right before Christmas when everything then shuts down. I know I might not get a call back and they might not see anything concerning, but then they just might and it will be another Christmas of worry like last year. Last Christmas was just so horrible. I was recovering from surgery, knew I would have to wait four weeks for results due to Christmas shut down and was so scared. The thought that there might be similar worries this year seemed too much to bear, So we had tears and melt down and now I have pulled myself together. There is nothing I can do about it. They won't move it earlier, it is where it is and it will be what it will be. Once again I will just have to trust in my faith to get me through a potentially worrying time. I have given myself a stern talking to. There are people in far worse situations, this may not even be a real concern, but when you suffer from anxiety telling yourself off doesn't always work! But, onwards and upwards and let's hope I get the all clear. Now that WOULD be a Christmas gift to remember. Meanwhile I will continue to battle with the lymphoedema and the neuropathic pain and try and move on.

 

But in other news, creativity has been good.

Firstly I have a happy little elephant to share  which I painted last week.

 

 

 

I also have lots of scrapping. Firstly the remaining pages from Scrap Squad's event

 

 

 

 

 

and this was a DT piece for ATDML

 

 

 

 

Today I am thankful for

• the fact I even get a mammogram at all
• the NHS
• the fact they got the cancer last time
• creativity that helps relax me
• Nigel - he even dealt with a full blown meltdown!

 

Comments

[Kim]

May the peace of our Lord give you peace and sustain you. As a cancer patient, I absolutely understand the anxiety.